Believe you can

Conformity is not my way

I can finally say that nowadays I have the courage to be me and do things without worrying about what people would think or disappointing someone. 
Before, I always changed how I was when dealing with different people. Around my ex in-laws I was nice, quiet, and would do whatever they told me because I wanted to be included. With ny different friends I was usually immature and annoying,  again trying to fit in. What a crappy way of life? Not knowing yourself, not feeling free to be you because no one would like it.
Whatever,  if you don't like me, then fine! Don't!  I am me and that is all I am going to be.

Let the dreams flow

Have you ever been a day dreamer or vivid sleep dreamer? Oh yes, I have.. I always have. I play all kinds of weird scenarios in my head all the time. Strange? Maybe. But it sure is interesting!  Try it, you will like it.

Love and lust

Most of my life I never understood love. I was always angry and depressed with ny life so I assumed love was a complete lie. I didn't really see a loving relationship between neighbors and friends either,  they all seemed to have the same relationship I did. I was disappointed by it and would be angry seeing love stories because they were so fake to me. When I was 29 that changed and boy did it ever! I was completely and ridiculously surprised by it that it honestly frustrated me because I was such a lousy person when it came to romance.  I still am! I am the absolute worst when it comes to trying to be saucy. I start laughing usually which just sucks if my husband is being serious. Gosh I just wish I knew what I was doing sometimes!

Win and lose

Smiles and laughter

Today I worked with someone I haven't seen in about a year. She is a really awesome chick. She is fun to talk to and she is always smiling and laughing. It really does make you feel good when you can smile and laugh with a friend. No matter how bad you feel, a good chuckle can brighten anyone's day!

Needing a break

Big words

We all that one person who continually overused big words in a conversation. I will admit I sometimes fall victim, but not typically. I work with people who every few words is some fancy long word. Then I read some peoples status updates and posts and in one sentence there will be at least 3 big words. Now the use of the words isn't a bad thing. It is the overkill that makes you seem desperate for acceptance or for people to think you are smart. I think people should talk however they are comfortable.  There is no reason to constantly have to think up big words in every sentence.  Just let words flow, even if it is a curse word. Who cares? You are you and no one can expect you to be anything else.

Pride in knowing. .

Everyone, even myself are quick to judge a book by its cover. After spending a good portion of my life on the receiving end of judgement,  I should be the last person to judge anyone else.... Everyone should learn and understand what pride means.

Beauty, what that means..

When people hear the word beauty, most immediately think of that famous model or actress and consider that is what beauty means. That is why the depression rate is so high for girls. They feel like they are not beautiful if they don't look like that. Beauty is within all of us, no matter what you look like. Our faces and bodies are not what depicts beauty. It is our actions, or body language, our minds. Beauty isn't just human deep as we all know. The world holds such beauty and wonder,  even a dying tree is the middle of an empty dust field can hold beauty. Character gives definition to the eye and puts forth a certain glow that can make anything look beautiful.  But our eyes aren't the only discoverers. The sounds, smells, feeling, taste... everything.

  We are completely surrounded, but anger and depression, drugs and alcohol can and will mask the things that are provided to make a beautiful life. Even if just for a moment you feel euphoric, remember, your brain is now under siege, you aren't truly feeling the way you think you do and when it is over, the ugly returns and you will do whatever is possible to seek the beauty again. You had it all along, without being forced to see it, so why mess with it?

So much to say

Anxiety

I used to have the most debilitating anxiety. Everything I did used to scare me and I think it was because I was so afraid of what people thought of me. I used to botch job interviews left and right because I would completely freeze up when they started asking those generic surveyed questions they all ask, and my response would be "uhhhhh I don't know" in a whispering voice. I was the same way in high school when the teacher called on me. It wasn't because I was dumb, it was because I was afraid to try. I was already made fun of daily,  the last thing I wanted was to incorrectly answer and get laughed at again.
I will admit, going back to college, starting a new job or promoting within the company still gives me butterflies, but when it comes down to it, I feel much more confident and excited, no longer afraid and procrastinating until it is no longer an option.  I am ready, are you?

Let's face the world!

So I am laying in bed tired, going to bed early because I have a super crazy long day at work tomorrow that I am major worried about because I haven't really been trained up on what I will be doing, but being thrown into action. .. anyway, as I sit and think about it.. I just know no matter what I need to show up, ready, excited, and showing my awesomeness although my nerves will eat me alive. 
We all have to tough out scary things. I have always had anxiety issues. They tend to get the best of me. But I am going to just grin and bare it, do my best and we will see how it goes!

Always love YOU!

We all have those down days.. for some that lasts for years. It is important to find love in yourself. That doesn't mean be IN love with yourself,  there is a difference. . Just find the love within you to make YOU feel good. You will be SHOCKED how much better you will feel. I sure was!

Why love should be a 2 way street

Love is and as it should be a two way street. When someone in the relationship is continually selfish and demanding, it will drive the other away. Love between two people should be generous and nurturing. I know as much aa anyone, sometimes it is hard, but since when is building a life with someone meant to be easy? Everything is a compromise, you win some, you lose some. For some, they are all take, no give, they expect the other to do whatever they say, give them everything at all demand, and give nothing back.
You can't do that and expect the love to stay true. I can't tell you how often when my husband and I are picking things out together, usually we have similar taste so it isn't hard, but sometimes we oppose and compromise but if I see it is something he just is excited about, I let go of my opinion and let him win, he does the same for me. That is what makes our marriage solid. We are generous to each other, and when you are loving and caring, your relationship will last for miles and miles!

Mentors and Followers

Time for YOU

I think making time for one to be alone is very important. It's good for the mind, body, and soul. As much as I love spending time with ny husband and family I know that if I don't have personal time alone then I may as well rip someone's head off, figuratively speaking. . Most of my alone time is spent writing or shopping. With the shopping I am not necessarily alone but I don't have to talk to anyone if I don't want to. For some it may be just 20min and fpr others they may need a day or three or five.. no one is the same but everyone needs to recharge. Take some time, relax, spoil yourself,  you deserve it!

Inspiration on Facebook

I am busy as always looking to get my stories out there to the world in hopes of helping others. I have started a page on Facebook.  Come look, like, and share at www.facebook.com/inspiredgirl1.  Thanks!

Today we shine

You would never know it from reading my addiction blogs, but I really love attention,  at least positive attention. I dont intentionally search for it. I just write stuff that is meaningful and hope someone likes it. That is good enough for me.
Some attention is good for you whether it is good or bad, we learn from it. There are many days I wake up and think,  "oh gosh I don't wanna go to work...why bother? " haha ya like I would just up and quit my job. I don't get paid to blog :(. I know too many people depend on me in different ways so I get my buns up, doll up, get dressed and drive my car across town and sit in my office for 10 hours to make a living. I am just waiting for my time to shine! It is coming, and so is yours,  so just hang in there :D !!

Do you need a push

Some of us need directions in life. We have no idea which wat is up amd that is usually how we end up in trouble. No matter what, keep moving forward. I can help you if you like!

Choosing the right path

There are times in our lives when we are faced with hard decisions. Sometimes we choose the path that is easy or safe seemingly. Those aren't always the best decisions for we are made to problem solve and face challenges head on. When we do that we find ourselves more rewarded and fuller feeling. The point is, go with your instinct. Welcome a challenge with open arms but sometimes the safe choice can be the right one too....

The pleasure of nature when one is sober

I love to go to new places all the time. I guess the years spent on the road traveling has made me stir crazy. But ever so often my husband and I will be sitting on the couch talking about whatever, as we do often. We decide to just hop in a car and drive.. go explore, find a new place we haven't been and go wonder. I think I tend to enjoy it a little more than he does.. we are both from 2 completely different walks of life after all.
I find it peaceful and since I've been sober it is easier to enjoy the wonders of nature.  I actually take the time to look. Whem i was on drugs the sun was unbearable and I didnt see color well.
As a teen I grew up in the country of northwestern Arkansas. It is very beautiful there. I appreciate it more visiting as an adult. Probably because I am not depressed anymore. 
I see the beauty in the trees, the birds, the streams, and the way the sun glissens off the green.

The endless walk

Back when I was an addict, life seemed like an endless walk down a dark tunnel of who know what would happen next. I always thought I would always be an addict. I didn't think there was any other choice. I sure didn't get the support I needed at home and if I stayed there, I would relapse over and over because I was the only one who WANTED to quit. It is sad really. But when the right door opened for me, I took it running full speed ahead...

Needing Time To Think

There are always day we sit and think, "man I need a day off to myself." I am a very busy person with a full time 47 hour a week job, remodeling the house to sell it, which seems like a never ending process, my writing which consists of 3 blogs, 2 books, and articles for multiple magazines I write for... I am usually mentally worn plum out. I like to be busy...after all, today I took the day off and guess what I am doing?? That's right, working, working, and more working, just not at my paying job.


We all need time for ourselves to just think. Even if it does mean, staying busy with whatever you love. You need time for you. I know people who never take time off from their everyday job, and they are angry, miserable, and make everyone around them hate being around them. Time for you is essential and although you may think you don't have time, too busy, have kids, need the money, need to do this and that...whatever. YOU NEED TIME TO JUST THINK. Relax, let the world go and take the time to just BE!

Beauty of Life

When I was an addict I never enjoyed anything.  I just wanted to stay in my apartment or RV and hide from the world. I didn't even like going outside.  Everything was ugly and too bright.

How do I do it?

Ever since I started my drug addiction blog, On the Road to Today: Breaking Drug Addiction, a few months ago I have got comments from people asking, why did you write such personal stuff about myself?  Well to answer that I said, in order for people to make a connection to you, you have to relate to others. I wrote my personal story of drug addiction and the many things I went through those 13 years. Some of my posts were very intimate. I feel if you want to truly help others you must understand what it is you are trying to help them with. Get personal, be real, be ASTONISHING!

Create Your Life

Dance is Inspiration

BEING STRONG